Emotional Resistance And The Fear Of Change

Emotional resistance stems from fear; fear that the pain of changing, no matter how much we wish to change, will be more than we can tolerate. By convincing ourselves that it is easier to ignore the pain, we resist change, in spite of the fact that it is often easier to face the pain and make the change than it is to resist it.

There are two types of emotional resistance:

  • Emotional Avoidance
  • Unconscious Negative Emotions

Emotional avoidance is the denial of feelings, possibly through the use of alcohol or drugs to dull the pain we feel, while unconscious negative emotions stem from the deeply seated fear of change and the emotional pain it may cause. Becoming conscious of these feelings is the first step to resolving and eliminating them.

When we ask ourselves a simple question, “Does this emotion serve me and my goals?” we begin to glimpse the negative emotions we need to change, the fear that restricts our growth and happiness. If your goal is to become a better person, a happier person, you must set aside these fears to move toward your goals.

Awareness is the first step to overcoming the emotional resistance to change, while making the commitment to changing these feelings comes next, followed by the practice of managing these feelings. By being mindful of the patterns you follow on a daily basis, by observing your thoughts and feelings, you will give yourself the opportunity to change them. One you recognize the negative aspects of your thought process, dedicating yourself to changing them becomes easier, and training yourself to do so will also become simpler for you.

Of course, this sounds simpler than it is, since we tend to hold our belief systems and thought processes very dear however, it is possible to overcome our emotional resistance to change, through the use of mindfulness, commitment, and daily practice.

Remember this, “That which you resist will forever exist.”

If you are trying to overcome your own tendency toward emotional resistance, and believe you would benefit from therapeutic help in doing so, get in touch with us today.

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