Resistance To Reason

Resistance to change is pervasive, most commonly due to preconceived notions of reality and deeply ingrained belief systems. While it is true that your reality is very real for you, in fact, it may not correspond to the real world at all. This is where fact and feelings can collide, creating cognitive dissonance, which results in fear and feelings of dislocation and unhappiness.

What do I mean by this? Well, when was the last time you “felt” that making a change in your life was good for you? And, when was the last time you actually made the change you “felt” was so important? I’m willing to bet never. I’m willing to bet the last time you actually, effectively made a change for the better in your life it was not because you felt you should – but because you thought it was the right thing to do.

Irrational thoughts and feelings can only and ever be overcome through the use of reason. Rational thought is the key to defeating destructive preconceived notions and irrational belief systems, no matter how deeply ingrained they may be.

If you continue to hold onto the irrational belief that your partner loves you, despite the fact that your partner regularly beats you, you will never make the change you need to be happy – or survive. If you persist in the notion that your partner loves you, despite the fact that your lover continuously sleeps with others, your persistent denial of reality will only result in continued unhappiness. Contrary to popular belief, abuse, whether physical or emotional, is not evidence of love. It never has been, and it never will be.

Reason, the acceptance of reality and the logical response to it, is the only tool you possess to overcome destructive belief systems. Once you accept that reality is real, and that you posses the tools to deal with it, your life becomes much simpler and happiness becomes a much more reachable goal.

The sun comes up each morning because the earth spins on its axis; not because the sun traverse the earth. A brick wall is something to go over or around; not through. A person deserves your love because of the values you share and because of the beauty of their spirit; not because you are somehow mysteriously compelled to love them; not because you have no choice in the matter.

In fact, you have a choice in everything you do, and your judgment is the tool you use to determine whether or not it is good for you. That judgment however, must be based in reality and, once it is, all you need do is think it through.

Remember this, “That which you resist will forever exist.”

If you are having trouble trying to accept the reality of your own life, and with applying rational solutions to your situation, get in touch with me today for therapeutic help in doing so.


  1. Destructive belief is sometimes hard to overcome specially in marriage where you have kids.One continues to believe in love where there is actually none.It hard to accept reality sometimes.

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